Thursday, May 20, 2010

Emotional Atyachar

I was quite aghast to see a channel showing a program called “Emotional Atyachar” with live coverage of boys and girls cheating on their partners. How on earth can a boy or a girl fall in love with his partner without even bothering to see what type of person he or she is. Is it love in the first place or just physical attraction. If it is physical attraction then there is every possibility that he or she has physical relations with others as well. Why do you have to hire a channel to test the loyalty of the partner. Is it lack of trust. Channel on it’s part has no right to invade the privacy of an individual and make it public.

I am not a psychologist but I consider myself good at reading the body language which helps me in understanding a person’s nature. Unfortunately, there are married couples who inspite of living together for many years don’t understand each other properly which ultimately ruins their marital relationship. When you meet a person of same sex or opposite sex, you need to understand the person you are meeting thoroughly. Generally, during such meetings, the person tries to project himself as the best person available. He does not reveal his true self. That is when reading the body language comes to your rescue. Rather than what he says, the body language tells you what he has in mind or his intentions. The tone, the eye contact, posture, Gesture, facial expression etc say something to you. If the body language is not in synch with what the person says, the person is hiding facts. You are not conscious of your body language while you are talking. It comes naturally to you as a reflex action. It is easy to manipulate what you say, but it is very difficult to manipulate your body language which is the true reflection of your intentions. Let us see how you can read body language

1> Hands-- When you meet and shake hands with the other person, just notice how he is holding your hands..If it is too tight and gripping, it means he is of dominating nature
If the other person holds your fingers instead of full hand, it means he lacks self confidence. If the person is holding your hand for a longer period than is necessary, he or she is physically attracted to you. If the hand is cold and loose, it means that the person lacks commitment and self determination.
2> Eye Contact--- The person to whom you are talking does not look straight into your eyes and constantly glances sideways, it means he is not interested in your conversation.
If the person flickers or blinks his eyes too frequently while talking, it means he is nervous. If he makes short eye contacts in between, it means either he is shy natured or he is lying.
3> Posture--- Posture tells a great deal about the person. If he is sitting upright with shoulders slightly leaning backwards, it means he is interested in conversation. If the person is sitting cross legged during conversation, it means he is defensive and over protective.
4> Facial Expression—Face is the mirror of the internal feelings of a person. If the face is glowing, it means he is free from anxieties. If the face is grim, it means he is tired, worried or sick
5> Movement of Hand—While the person is speaking, look at his hands. If his hands are outstretched, it means he is accommodative and confident. If he holds his hands tightly to his chest, it means he lacks self confidence The pace at which he speaks also gives an indication of his personality. If he speaks too fast or speaks in high pitched tone, he lacks maturity.

Reading body language is only indicative of knowing a person's nature specially a person whom you have never met before but not necessarily a foolproof method.

2 comments:

Mona said...

Having been a lecturer of communication in the hotel management industry institute, I know that 70% of a person is revealed by body language , 20% by tone & other devices & only 10% by words that he speaks.

Emotional Atyachar, although I have not seen that programme , I hear that it is a knock off, of an American reality show. Indian TV people are merely apes. They copy every reality show, that is a hit abroad, like kaun banega cororepati was a knock off of who wants to be a millionaire, & American Idol became Indian idol, Biggest loser became biggest loser jeetega & Ugly Betty became Jassi jaisi koi nahin.

Vijay said...

Mona, good to know that you are a lecturer in hotel management Industry. I conduct leadership management program in corporates in which communication is one of the topics. If you are put up in Mumbai, may be I could invite you a a guest lecturer in topics such as communication. It is just a thought. yes, I agree with you, there are many instances of blatantly copying T.V reality shows, music, film stories etc. It is far more easy to cut and paste than creating originals.